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Xiao-Feng-Fury

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

A true Christian.

Xiao-Feng-Fury, a self proclaimed "Slave to righteousness" is a devianTARTLET and Jesus Fangirl who was up until recently most popular for her Tekken fanart slashing various characters that would never actually look at each other, let alone have sex. Like most tartlets however she was not happy with 60,000 page views and decided that she needed to pull some stunt in order to maintain higher status. So like a true tartlet she decided to have an epiphany(AKA: go batshit).

1 Quitting Lesbianism for Jeebus
2 Tekken fanart can't pray the gay away
3 Xiao-Feng-Fury Retaliates for GREAT JUSTICE!
4 How to Argue the Xiao-Feng-Fury Way
5 Xiao-Feng-Fury being batshit and lulzy
6 Teh Secret!
7 Technical Virginity
8 A Christian response
9 External Links

[edit] Quitting Lesbianism for Jeebus

No liek teh masturbation. :(

Asspats.

Jesus Candy for teh SOUL!!11

Have you tried Jeebus?

As seen in this monumental journal entry here: ~~[1]~~ -BALEETED! Xiao announced to the entire tartlet community that she quit lesbianism in favor of banging her imaginary friend last Thursday .(No, really) This of course came to her in a mind blowing epiphany where she made a complete ass of herself at her local Dillards department store and admitting to playing with other kids' genitalia when she was just a wee child. Also in her startling epiphany she admitted to (OMFG) masturbation, which, according to her, is right up there on the immorality scale with animal rape [2]. Reactions from the tartlet community varied. Some ass-patting ensued from her longer time Christian fans applauding her courage, as well as some butthurt gayz retaliating. More importantly however, it became a source of much lulz in the form of DevianTART drama, including pimping Jesus like a candy bar. (mmm, peanut-buttery goodness!)

[edit] Tekken fanart can't pray the gay away

Gheyz are toolz of Satan!

Xiao, like many people who can't accept it in themselves attempts to sublimate her gayness by ralling against it. Go onto Deviant and ask her about her lost years as an ugly lesbiean. She will tale you stories of tears, voices in her head, the sweet embrace of a woman, and finally, her transformation into a asexual ugly weaboo.

“	Spiritually speaking and even physically speaking, my flesh will try to rise up and remind me of the days of old. I pray this daily because my struggle is often a daily battle. God forgave us, only I can condemn myself if I allow the flesh to lie to me.	„
—This girl thinks about fucking girls all the time

Not only is homosexuality wrong, a choice, and something people can quit by switching over to Jesus, but it is actually Satan's tool. You see, Satan figured that if he could just get a man to stick his cock inside the ass of another man, then that would totally piss off God and give him Over 9000 pwn points. As for lesbianism, well, Satan obviously just needed something to get off on, and a more radical way for feminists to express cock-hate. See? Total tools of teh Devil.

[edit] Xiao-Feng-Fury Retaliates for GREAT JUSTICE!

Can't have that!

The gheyz are brainwashing your children.

Holy shit dude...

Cult like whut?

PWNT!!11

Unfortunately Xiao does not have a very original way of responding to the criticisms of her 'testimonial'. Like tracer tartlet AniutqaDA she reverts to hiding comments that she doesn't have a snappy comeback to, such as a quote from the bible. She doesn't just hide criticisms however, she also hides her own comments when she looks back at them and realizes that they were completely idiotic, such as when her reply to one criticism was to post the lyrics to "Amazing Grace" (See screenshots plz). Aside from her arsenal of bible quotes and songs however, she also cites the rules of the playground that we all learned in grade 2 (see moar screenshots plz.) She also claims that a lot of people defend the gheyz because of the 'homosexual agenda'. In other words, Elton John sneaking into kids bedrooms at night and trying to turn them gay.

[edit] How to Argue the Xiao-Feng-Fury Way

1. Say that childhood sexual abuse and sexual curiosity makes you gay

2. Claim that all gays are evil and confused, but that the power of JEZUZ can save you!

3. Open rebuttal to opposition with “I lived half that lifestyle”

4. Spout “love the sinner, hate the sin” or say “When did I ever say I hate homosexuals?”, immediately followed by a condemnation of the ‘lifestyle’

5. Define gay agenda as simply being gay [3]

6. Thoughtlessly say that an all-loving, all-forgiving god “doesn’t tolerate sin”

7. Cite a batshit fundie site as primary source of information when questioned [4]

8. Use fallacious studies and testimonials from repressed gay people as proof that homosexuality can be cured with the love of Jeebus.

9. Compare masturbation to animal rape

10. Admit that straight people sin in various ways but remain fixated on the gheys

11. Endless copypasta of the same four Bible verses

12. Ignore alternative interpretations of said verses, no matter how valid the points seem

13. Have uberspect troll your thread

14. Cite WorldNetDaily to bolster your claims [5]

15. Claim that FOX News is one of the "democratic channels"[6]

16. Say “thx for your support! xD” or “Continue to pray for me, brethren” to asslicking fundies and airheaded weeaboos giving you asspats

17. Maintain that you will continue preaching the truth regardless of what people say

18. Block dissenting comments

19. Repeat with a combination of steps 1-18 verbatim to any and all further arguments

20. ????

21. PROFIT!!!

Batshit nigger camwhore

[edit] Xiao-Feng-Fury being batshit and lulzy

LOLWUT

WHEN SOMEONE TELLS YOU SOMETHING MOAR BATSHIT, HIDE THE COMMENT! We won't have any non-born agains here thank you very much.

An eyewitness' account of the events.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!1!! If you bitch at her in another comment, she replies! (see above picture dumbass)

She replies YET AGAIN, and the irony is sweet

A more succinct description of Christianity there never was

“	It is unrealistic to think that we can determine how a child will live, therefore having the child to die. Look at my CURRENT situation. I left my wallet at work that has alot of personal stuff in it. Considering the dangers of such a situation or should we say...circumstance that COULD occur, should i run to my mom and ask her to kill me?	„
—Pro-life Xiao-Feng-Fury, makes a strong arguement

“	This started a spiritual warfare in me. I literally heard voices in my head to became lesbian again and to hate God. I thought I was going crazy. I couldn't sleep, I heard these voices everywhere. One even told me to kill myself.	„
— Xiao-Feng-Fury, being schizo

“	I feel awesome, The Holy Spirit went wild in this woman!! Satan is crying like a loser!!	„
— Xiao-Feng-Fury, pwning the Devil

“	Homosexuality and lesbianism are tools of satan. It has strong confusion, it is filthy, and once you know this, Satan will fight to keep you as a homosexual or lesbian. Don't let him win.	„
— Xiao-Feng-Fury

“	Homosexuality is proven to be a behavioral more than genetic. And even if it were genetic, this doesn't mean that the Lord can't save you. He can save anyone, anytime; anywhere.	„
— Xiao-Feng-Fury, pimping God and failing at grammar

“	Continue to pray for me, brethren. My name is Natalie, by the way. :) I see many ppl are actually trying to re write my own testimony! :laughing: They need prayer.	„
— Xiao-Feng-Fury, you know her name, now go stalk her!

“	Well , my friend...then i'm a nutcase.	„
— Xiao-Feng-Fury, that explains it

“	dirty thoughts are sinful.	„
— Xiao-Feng-Fury NEVAR thinks dirty thoughts

“	In regards to homosexuality hurting ppl...yes it is also hurting ppl. In california, the governor signed a law that allows for homosexuals to enter into ANY restroom they may feel, and that one must not call their parents by MOM or DAD. They must be called Guardians...as it supposedly offends homosexuals...	„
— Xiao-Feng-Fury, spouting fundamentalist bullshit [7]

“	of course this is the political corruption of homosexuality, but this relates with what the Lord says about homosexuality in regards of it being immoral.	„
— Xiao-Feng-Fury, LOL WUT [8]

“	yes, i know that, but homosexuals have no choice but to have either anal or oral sex. Both types of sex, (hetero or homo), can lead to the breaking of skin, and as far as oral goes, it can also lead to some issues if there are no precautions. Either way, homosexuals will have oral or anal sex. And the end results of these sexual experiences lead to many STDs including AIDS.	„
— Xiao-Feng-Fury, forgeting that some girls also like it in the pooper [9]

“	Hey, if scientist says we're animals...and by evolution (since ppl are giving in to that pile of crap) we're born as parasites and are part animal, then sex with dogs is fine..because we're animals!	„
— Xiao-Feng-Fury, on being a furry [10]

[edit] Teh Secret!

The Gay Pretender!.

Xiao's (Natalie) real life sister contacted an EDiot and let the awful truth be known. Xiao's gospel is built on a HOUSE OF LIEZZZZ! Her whole schtik is that she is a lesbiean who WALKED AWAY (limping) from the sweet pleasure of bush and bewbs. However, as you can see in the quotes above she seems to be having a hard time using Jesus magic to keep the gay out.

Turns out its even more lulzy than that! She never was a lesbo to begin with, she's pretending to be a ex-lesbo to inspire others to not be gay too! Her denial/non denial of truths/fantasy has created a Time paradox that could kill us all!

[edit] Technical Virginity

“	It is time that all her dA kiss ups get to know her for the liar she truly is	„
—Guess who's flesh and blood sister wrote this?

Xiao knows how to party!.

Natalie maintains her physical purity like a thief in the night. Despite what this virginal sexpert has to say about the inns and outs of homosexual sex (which is to say,a lot, go figure), she still takes the time to consent to and enjoy the folowing activities;

1. Getting felt up at a video game convention by a stranger with a race based fetish.

2. Nursing a random tipo with her holy breasts that she met at a BUS PARKING LOT.

[edit] A Christian response

Xiao manages to piss off the Christian weaboo comunity of Deviant Art as well. Click here for a delightful series of comic strips made by Christians embarassed over Xiao's and Voreaphile Stinky-05's antics [11]