ZX Spectrum
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Contents |
The ZX Spectrum
The spectrum was, is, and will always be the most powerful computer evar. What made it so good was its total immunity to AIDS, due to the clever rubber keys on the 48K model acting as an anti-virus condom. as a result the interweb was for a time completely AIDS free, so free in fact that blood could be purchased on eBay from Africa without giving it a second thought.
Made in England, it soon became one of the UK's largest exports, beaten by only two commercial properties - Pot Noodle and dogging. The Spectrum's only serious competion came from Commodore, however it brought on its own downfall after releasing the system exclusives "Jet Set Allah" and "Suicide Bomb Jack II" - as a result their offices and factories were fire-bombed by irate towelheads, giving Sinclair the freedom to run the UK/European drug cartel without problems from rival comapanies. At least until they got cocky and fucked everything up.
If the Spectrum was so hardcore, one may wonder why the heavy boys in the IT industry struggle today. This is down to the fact that Bill Gates failed to steal anything from the Spectrum and instead used his own half-cooked programming to clone it and failed. This was an issue with all versions of Windows, so in his most recent OS Bill "borrowed" design ideas from macintosh hoping to gloss over the gaping holes in his code. Unfortunately, as Apple has also found to their cost, this tactic only works on shallow assholes with no understanding of how computers work.
ALL programmers know that BASIC is 1337.
Internet on the Spectrum
Technical Specifications
CPU: Zilog Z80A CPU running at 2.99999999 (repeating of course) MHz (or NEC D780C-1 clone)
Memory:19.333 739 068 902 037 589kb
Sound: Humagination 1.0 (tap hard surface to the rhythm of a flashing pixel
Display Resolution: 255×191x14.5
Floppy: Dual External 5 15/16" floppy
Internet (Max Speed): 63 BPS (line noise reduces down to 20 BPS)
Superfuntimehappy Games
 OMG AWP CAMPING COUNTER-STRIKE FAGGOT !!!! |
 It was Asking for it |
 Todays music sucks |
 Who'd have thought this company became Nintendo |
