Attention Whore
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Most commonly found on the Internets, an Attention Whore is almost invariably a sixteen year old girl who desperately craves attention in any form. The majority of Attention Whores are completely insane and most still attend high school. Massive attention whores have Histrionic Personality Disorder.
While it is widely believed (and hoped) that there is a special circle of Hell dedicated for Attention Whores, the truth is that their own miserable lives and public embarrassment are a far worse punishment than anything Satan could conjure up himself. The only way to cure Attention Whoredom is to fuck the living daylights out of the subject, or, if they are jailbait and buttugly, hand them over to Pedobear, who will fuck anything that has a small vagina and no tits.
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Types of Attention Whore
While it is possible for Attention Whores to simply be classified as whores for public attention, they are generally divided into four, more specific attention whoring categories:Attention Whore Tactics
In order to obtain their necessary daily dosage of attention, Attention Whores will employ variety of tactics. Common examples include:
- Turning an internet wide joke into a serious business protest because of minimal mention from media sources,
- Telling outrageous, usually untruthful stories about things which they claim happened to them. These stories may include incidents in which they were almost raped, most times by a close family member or friend; claiming that they have been (or are being) stalked; claiming that they were shot in the spleen, et cetera.
- Uploading copious amounts of pictures of themselves at various angles.
- Claiming to be bisexual.
- Using a tripcode.
- Posting poetry which alludes to their "dark and mysterious" past.
- Tricking guys into the Friend Zone.
- Making YouTube videos where you just stare at the camera.
- Claiming they're 90 pounds, when [irl] they're obese.
- Contributing to Encyclopedia Dramatica.
- Stealing from Encyclopedia Dramatica.
- Vandalizing Encyclopedia Dramatica.
- Looking at Encyclopedia Dramatica.
- Posting song lyrics meant to describe their "no one understands me!" emotional states.
- Cutting or occasionally half-heartedly attempting suicide.
- Deleting their LiveJournals, only to return 48 hours later.
- Shameless self promotion.
- Recording and posting over 9,000 videos on MySpace and YouTube.
- Wearing makeup and very little or very slutty clothing when webcam chatting.
- Saying, "I dEaLzS dRuGz" at every opportunity.
- Claims they are a Big Deal constantly.
- Repeating popular/funny quotes from popular shows, CONSTANTLY.
- Saying "I FUKEN' LUV J000000!!~211~!" to all of their friends.
- Starting "flame wars" with their troll socks.
- Pretending to be "GANGSTAAAAAAA" and referring to everybody as "NIGGA".
- Filling out and forwarding pointless questionnaire after pointless questionnaire, revealing their favorite things and secret dreams.
- Filming or photographing themselves dancing in their underwear. (Not that we're complaining...)
- Saying they were mugged by a nigra based on their political beliefs.
- Commenting pictures of themselves saying "OMG NOTICE HOW MY LEG IS BENDING THAT WAY AND I DIDNT EVEN DO THAT ON PURPOSE. IM LYK SOOOO FLEXIBLE HEHEHE"
- Constantly reminiscing SUCH CRAZY TYMES and real BAMF moments with their fellow attention whore friends..while in a group of strangers.
- During a conversation with an attention whore you will notice they use more sexual innuendos then "The Todd" from Scrubs says in a whole season.
Beware: If you have sex with one of these people she or he will tell the whole Internets how shit you were. In detail. Even if you're really good. Furthermore, if you end a relationship with an Attention Whore, she may invite the whole world to an online self pity party and reveal to everyone what a evil person you are. Attention whores can make you lose all interest in the opposite sex and turn you gay. In fact, 98% of gays are the result of dating attention whores.
Infamous Attention Whores
YouTube: Home of the Attention Whore
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Gallery
| Gallery of Attention Whores | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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See Also
- Bebo
- Blog
- Emo
- Emosexuality
- Thesugarmonster
- iCarly
- PirateSmacK
- Kathy Griffin
- MySpace
- Nameless
- Oompa Loompas
- Ruining The Internet
- YouTube
- LiveWire
- Seto-Kaiba.com
- Steve Hodder-Watt
External Links
- Play Drama Queen Bingo!
- Read an Attention Whore's reasons to live.
- Read An AW announces her "engagement" on FARK.
- Read A Male Attention Whore's final blog before he becomes an hero.
- Watch Attention Whores on American Idol.
- Watch Attention Whoring, emo style
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Attention Whore is part of a series on the cancer that is killing /b/. |
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| Attention Whore is part of a series on Whores. |
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