Magick
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
An example of deluded poseurs Penn and Teller.
Effete spelling of magic, now with a "k" for extra phear! Used to demonstrate that the user is really cool, 1337 and clued in to a centuries-old tradition of real, authentic, honest-to-goodness magic, and not merely a deluded poseur.
Supporters of this aberrant spelling will be all "blah blah Qabballah blah blah Crowley blah blah blah", but I'm all like "talk to the hand".
Some 1337 magickians noted on Encyclopedia Dramatica include Son of Art, Usva and Nathan Satan.
Contents |
[edit] List of Magickal Acts
- Telekinesis
- Internet disease
- Use voodoo doll
- Summon retard
- Morph 80 year old Chinese man in panties into 16 year old girl
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Transform furry into humanActually, centuries of knowledge perpetuated by the wise and elder generation after generation have come in aid of this task, to no avail. TL;DR: LOL IMPOSSIBLE - Go visit astral WAL-MART on the astral planes.
[edit] Signs of Magick users
- Overweight
- Shops at real magick stores like hot topick.
- Candles burning in room.
- Constant stench of patchouli and absinthe
- Talks like he's playing Dungeons and Dragons at all times.
- Fails at everything she tries, but excuses herself with "my goddess doesn't want me to do that".
- Believes that God can be a female.
- Cannot perform card tricks.
- visits spellsofmagic.com the GEYEST SITE EVAR (good for lulz, lots of easly butt-hurt members to make fun of also look at Ancient Jew Love Spell for extra lulz
[edit] Types of magickians
- Sex Magickian Hey baby, wanna do some tantra yoga to further our spirituality? See also anal sex and rape.
- Wiccan And so after astral projeckting and acending to the nth plane, I came in ckontackt with the divine manifestation of the natural being. I was empowered with a sense of ckonfidence and felt my powers grow. I became one with the universe. When I wocke up, my cklothes were missing and my ass hurt. Did I mention I'm bi and I licke Fall Out Boy?
- Kabbalist Where the fuck are my infinite riches?
- Kaos magickian So there I was with this girl who wanted to astral projeckt, so I gave her a voodoo potion and fucked her till sunrise, then I dumped her nacked ass on the street and bought porn with her ckredit ckards. Oh, and Cthulhu said hi.
- Satanic magickian Satan, hear me, I am thy hand on earth. I bow for no man, I spit on the weack, I fear no one. Grant me thy unholy powers. Jeremy!! What do you thinck you're doing? Your room stincks of incense, there are ckandles burning and you're not even dressed for church! Sorry Mom...
- New Ager/Druid I strive to beckome one with the universe, and lose my ego in the greater depths of ckosmick being. My earthly attachements will dissolve and I will transcend this plane of existence, like when last summer solstice at Stonehenge we toock three hits of E each and really ckonneckted with the earth. Got any herb?
There are many spinoffs, such as FacePunch cards.
[edit] See Also
- Astraldancer
- David Blaine
- Penn & Teller
- Alchemy
- MemoryandDream
- Michelle Belanger
- Sylvia Browne
- Otherkin
- Psion Guild
