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EmeraldGuardian1

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Revision as of 15:57, 8 September 2009 by MadMechanic (Talk | Contribs)
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IM IN UR GALLERY ADDING PIX
Add pixplzkthnx to EmeraldGuardian1
Plz to be adding some pix now kthnx. Consult the image selection process for help, or just google up some pix.
Plz remove this notice once there are plenty of pix.



Contents

The Internet Love of a Life Time

ugly fucker who looks like a cave man
ugly fucker who looks like a cave man
A recent close-up reveals EmeraldGuardian is ugly at ANY angle
A recent close-up reveals EmeraldGuardian is ugly at ANY angle

EmeraldGuardian1 is a whiny little piece of emo shit and a 17 year old boy who is in e-love with Hannah-the-Echidna. He is into Sonic and used this as the foundation to their relationship. Their obsession with each other and sonic went on and on, and all was sweet and honey until they had a misunderstanding, possibly started here or here. Before he met Hannah, however, he was in a love with a girl from Fanart-Central named Amanda. Apparently she cheated on him with another guy and he went on his little rampage about how all women suck.

THEY'RE ALL SCUMBAGS!1@!!1@!!
THEY'RE ALL SCUMBAGS!1@!!1@!!

Something happened and EmeraldGuardian11111 went nuts. He ranted about how all women suck, cried and threatened suicide. Of course, this meant lots of lulz to go around, shown here. Sadly, the whiny little cocksucker hid all the other comments because he couldn't take what he gave out.

LOVE IS OVER AT 17!
LOVE IS OVER AT 17!
Dan is also suicidal
Dan is also suicidal

The next day, he deleted the entry and tried to pretend his stupidity never happened... but we all know better. ED doesn't forget idiots, fucker. journal

oh woe angst and suicide...oh we're back together!
oh woe angst and suicide...oh we're back together!

Never forget fucker

Update!

In the months since his ED page was created, Dan has been stalking Hannah relentlessly. This includes :

  • telling her to die of cancer
  • saying he hoped her and her elderly Granny die in a car fire
  • lied about another girl giving him a titty wank because he thought it would make her jealous
  • drawing love art between them, despite Hannah asking him not to portray her in such a fashion
  • actually going over to England to stalk her IRL

What a nice guy, huh?

IRL Stalking

Hannah had this to say prior to his arrival:

 
 
Greetings, people!

It's going to be a bit hard to get hold of me for two weeks starting tomorrow (Monday) because the worst has happened.


Yup. Dan is coming to visit. Thank you mum, for being so amazingly.... retarded. Two week of hell coming my way, yippee ki-AY. I thought having a stalker would be awesome, but no. It's all fun and games until they get to stay in your room.

I pray for spiders. The size of cannonballs.

I MAY log on now and again, but if I don't please don't be offended. I've either been kidnapped or I'm in jail FOR kidnapping.

I'm overrun with stupid boys at the moment. But I have spotted a few sweet ones! They DO exist!

I'm thinking of getting a new phone, so maybe I should just post my number on here and see how many prank phone calls I get.

Text me call me SAVE me.
 


 

—Hannah-the-Echidna, sounding like she was totally asking for it. It's all right here, folks

During his stay in England, Dan was a totally awesome fella. He demonstrated how nice he was by shoving her, twisting her arm (leaving bruises), actually hitting her, and making a point of openly masturbating in front of her, despite the fact that she DOES NOT WANT. In addition, Hannah knocked over his bag by mistake and saw some of her manga inside. So, besides everything else, Dan's also a thief!

Hannah and family were so pissed off by Dan's behaviour that they cut his 2 week trip short. They rescheduled his ticket so he went home on August 16th instead of the 23rd, despite protestations from Dan and his whore mother. He also was sure to advertise these things openly on the Journal for his now-defunct fanclub for him and his girlfriend, just to prove what a mature person he was. Disregard that, the fanclub was hacked by one of Hannah's friends!

However, Dan did post this journal after returning home from England:

Who is telling the truth here?
Who is telling the truth here?

He keeps on updating and editing this certain journal so stay tuned!

[POST SOMETHING NICE PLZ]

EmeraldGuardian1 is Hacked!

A few months ago, Dan's EmeraldGuardian1 account was "hacked". Whether or not this is true is hard to say, as Dan is batshit insane. He could have fucked with his own account and said it was hacked, just to escape to a new account. Evidence against this hacking is that every comment that was placed on his front page was quickly hidden. Now, what kind of hacker would do that?

However, it is a fact that the now dead fanclub for Dan and Hannah was hacked by Hannah's best friend, HelenBaby, as indicated in the screenshots below.

Hannah's LJ reply

Y'know, I was all prepared to leave the recent drama in the past. It's bollocks to keep harping on about stuff that's done, and dusted, and at least 1000 miles away, but noooo, it seems the other party can't let it drop.

I'm perfectly fine with him calling me a liar, because I know for a fact I'm not. He's said 'I never hit her or grabbed her' when he did. He did so, so hard that I had huge bruises across my arm, and he still had hold of me when I was screaming for my Nana to help. When my nan saw him, he was caught red handed, and shat himself, RUNNING out of the house. Then he started saying 'she said she was sleeping with many people, so I responded.' Oh ey. THAT's believable considering my nan was in ear-shot, and I'm very private about my sex life. Speaking of which, I dumped him long ago. What business is it of him?

Anyways, my parents phoned his, and I was right there in the room when his OWN FATHER was screaming at him saying 'YOU NEVER PUT YOUR HANDS ON SOMEONE ELSE!!!'

His mother's going nuts, phoning our house every few minutes complaining about me being on the internet. She's asking me not to reveal anything more. She's openly stated she's monitoring my accounts, Besides, most of the stuff is revealed anyways, and the remaining stuff makes me sick even thinking about it. Okay, maybe it wasn't the most considerate thing for me to bring it to light on DeviantART, as it's a site we must co-habitate on, but this is my LiveJournal, with the text open to friends only right now. It's MY place to rant and rave and release tension and relate to people how upset I am. It'll be a cold day in hell when I change my PRIVATE LJ for some idiot who should face up to what he's done. I think I'm being pretty damn fair by not mentioning names directly, but other than that, they have to deal.

Besides, everyone who's even reading this has read the DA journal with the most explicit detail in, so it's not like I'm bringing anything new to light... Besides! He's always the first to say HANNAH'S A SLUT, WOMAN ARE FUCKTARDS!!! in public. The only difference now is that I actually speak things that are true. Hmmmm... funny old world, aint it?

I'm complete honest when I say the guy scared me. Before he even came he said some really threatening thing, the one I remember the most being:

Him: I'm going to bang you! Me: Not bloody likely! Him: What? Like you can stop me?

I'll be the first to admit I NEVER wanted him here, and crossed wires and what I believe is stubbornness on my parent's side and ignorance on his parents side caused this result. My mother was feeling we needed to pay out dues because I've been over there before. After allot of arguments, I held my hands up and said I'd try to be a good host, as going to another country is a fantastic opportunity for anyone. I find it hard to stay mad, and although he was intimidating to me, I would keep him busy by showing him all the cool spots. It just didn't turn out that way and I got bruises and verbal abuse for my trouble. The guy even tried to steal some of my manga, but I saw it in his bag and removed them. It's a good thing I keep stickers on the books so I know they're mine. He did, however, succeed in stealing a necklace he gave me once for my birthday, but it's not really a loss to me.

That's pretty much my final words on the matter.


I was going to make this sooner, but I have allot of stuff going on which needs my attention. As soon as his mother stops calling the house to see if I've gone out with another boy or something, the sooner I can forget the whole thing. Anyways, it's my journal! Let me rant all over it!

The Gallery of Ongoing E-Love

One of Hannah's friends posted up some wonderful images here to show us just how much of a pathetic cunt dear little EmeraldGuardian is.



Dan admits to everything!

Dan admits what Hannah said was true! He also admitted to being bipolar here.

This was posted on the same day Hannah posted the latest in this lulzy tale here.

Image:Bleach.PNG

It hass also come to our attention that Hannah has a new boyfriend! Watching Dan's response is going to be priceless, so keep an eye on his journal for the latest shitfits.

Gallery

External links

The Fangirls

See Also



Image:Dalogo.jpg EmeraldGuardian1 is part of a series on DeviantART   
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