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This page contains spoilers — Important plot secrets and/or conclusions may be revealed. For example, HOLY SHIT French are fucking unfunny weird peopple !!!1
The Furangina "Naturally juicy" advert was spewed like a rope of Godless pulpy horror from the tip of the Eiffel Tower onto an unsuspecting world around the end of 2007. While anthropomorphic animals have been used in a fairly close-to-the-trotter manner to shill products before, none of them had quite got as far using fruit juice to imply forced lactation and giant Orangina bottles to simulate Doug Winger-style macrophilefutabukkake.
It will probably go down in history as the shock campaign which affected normal people and Anonymous with equal force. Those who were aware of the tropes to which it was paying homage were horrified that someone actually got this shit on television, while those who weren't were left either murmuring under the chair in a fetal ball or rushing to the mailbox to cancel their subscription to The Bible. Even some furries themselves find this commercial at least awkward to watch, since most seem to be used to their ten-penis, fifty-vagina'd hermaphroditic buttsecks being cartoony as opposed to realistic.
Speaking of hermaphroditic buttsecks, only male peacocks have the faggy tail feathers, yet the ones in the video also had tits. Peacocks indeed.
UK Anons are presently trying to get the ad removed for great justice. You can help by adding moar letters saying it offends your religion to this address:
The Advertising Standards Authority
www.asa.org.uk
Tel: 020 7492 2222
Mid-City Place
71 High Holborn
London
WC1V 6QT
UPDATE: epic ad burns anon haha
Quotes
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Interspecies erotica: perhaps the last taboo left untouched by advertising. Sure the Caramel Bunny flirted, but you knew she never put out. But anything goes these days as the deranged Orangina Naturally Juicy advert confirms. This citric acid-fueled CGI romp of sex-crazed fauna dry-humping each other is eye-poppingly weird. Lady Zebras in bikinis straddle phallic Orangina bottles that spray their unholy payload over a go-go dancing rabbit. The imagery in a Cher video looks timid in comparison.
It seems that we have reached a point where furries can co-exist peacefully with the higher lifeforms.
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—Lautaylo
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WHAT IS THIS! GRAB YOUR PITCH FORKS AND TORCHES WERE MARCHING FRANCE
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—viralmjk
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OH DEAR JESUS CHRIST! GORDON BROWN FOR FUCK'S SAKE GET THE FUCKING TRIDENTS AND AIM THEM AT PARIS OH JESUS CODE RED OH MY FUCKING GOD CALL CHRIS RYAN OH JESUS.
OH THOSE FAILURES OF MILITARY CONFLICT JUST HAD TO CREATE THIS LIKE THE CREEPY PEDOPHILE WHOS DAD BEAT HIM AS A KID HAS TO MOLEST KIDS AS AN OUTLET BECAUSE HE CANT STAND UP FOR HIMSELF. THIS IS ENOUGH OF A REASON TO NUKE THOSE QUEERS RIGHT OFF THE GOD DAMN MAP. TO ARMS!
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—FreshPrinceoBelAir.
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I hope Germany invades France again for this, and pwns the fucking frog eating garlic shitting frenchy bastards.
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—User: Re-Con.
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I haven't been this turned on since Goatse hit teh internets. Way to go, France!
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— User: Samefag69, who must be killed.
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This is the single most amazing thing I've ever witnessed. It's better than PICKLE SURPRISE. By far.
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—User:PagerNiner12.
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That's it, time to gouge my eyes out with a battery.
„
—User:Grin&Bearit, who doesn't.
Previous Quote | Next Quote
A CHALLENGER APPEARS
A company called "Cascade Beer" released a video that isn't nearly as sexual, but still pretty fucking creepy. Especially at the end.
